Connection.

Fuck that hurt.
A wave of pain engulfs my mind.
Focus on that one point of impact.

What the hell?  Tears?
Anger rises. I don’t cry.
I never do.
How dare you bring tears.

The pain is now riding through my nerves like a whirlwind.
I crumple.
I give in to it and the tears flow.
I can’t speak.

I turn.
Anger swirling, rage ready to lunge.
“Don’t do that!”
I turn away to hide.
Breathe. More pain.

The pain smothers me.
Clouding my mind from all thought.
I’m riding the highest wave.
A voice beckons.

Eyes connect, strong arms surround me. I sob.
The wave has passed. The pain lingers.
It wasn’t the hurt on the outside.
It was hurt on the inside coming out.
Release.

A strange feeling.
A moment.
A realisation.
I’m exposed.

Raw.

So I have two attachments sitting here. One for the Hitachi and one for the Mini Fairy Wand.

The top one is the Jollies Bubbles Hitachi Attachment. And the bottom one is the Dr.Vibe Mini Fairy Wand attachment. So why two? I’m greedy haha. Actually no, I wanted to do a comparison on massagers and their attachments to see what would be the differences if any. The Fairy Wand is generally more intense and the Hitachi seems to carry deeper vibrations so it made me start wondering what the actual differences would feel like and whether or not an attachment could change my personal preference over the Hitachi.

Let’s just say it was an interesting discovery.

A basic comparison & run down on each …

Both are silicone. Awesome.
Both require a water based lubricant, not silicone please if you value the life of your silicone toys.
Really.easy.to.clean.
Both are non porous, pthalates free, hypo-allergenic, food grade material and latex free. So in laymans terms they are totally safe to use.
Both are also PINK (makes vomit face) … alas, I haz a sad.

I really get annoyed at the amount of freekin pink sex toys out there. C’mon people stop doin that!

They are also both awesomely easy and versatile to keep clean, a simple warm water wash with anti bacterial soap or use toy cleaner. If you want to be extra specially clean then you can pop both toys in the top of the dishwasher (remember to NOT add the dishwasher powder!) or boil them for three minutes in a pot of water. Easy peasy lemon squeezy.

The most noticable and great thing about both of these attachments is they both fit snuggly on the wands and don’t move about even on the highest speeds which is great because there’s nothing worse than a bloody flying projectile covered in lubricant just when you are about to get your rocks off!

So here’s the bit you really want … which one is better?

A closer look at the two ….

It’s pink like a marshmallow and it’s about as much fun as sitting on a marshmallow. So the Jollies Bubbles attachment is firm all over yet bendable and flexible. The bulbs themselves are sold and not hollow. The vibrations travel well and I found that focusing the tip of the attachment on my clitoral area quite intense as the vibrations were focused in a smaller area and more powerful. I didn’t however do the wild thing for my g-spot. I have weird anatomy. The three bulbs from top towards bottom were insertable but the fourth one is just an attachment point and isn’t really a happening thing. It fits snuggly on the Hitachi and doesn’t slip and needs a bit of careful prying to get it off when you are finished with it. There is a visible seam running up the side of the toy but it’s not physically noticeable at all. It’s full length is 7″ with an insertable length of 4 1/4″. You can use on the clitoral area, with the bulbs it can create some interesting sensations running it up and down. vaginal/g-spot play and you can use it anally also. If you do decide to try it in both orifices please use a condom, it makes life easy when it comes to hygiene.  Especially if you plan on sharing it. I found it to be awkward and chunky to use, I did try it out all three ways and I ended up using the attachment end to focus on my clit while I used a dildo so in saying that … it was kind of a fail for keeping my attention.

I love my Hitachi more than the Fairy Wand BUT the Hitachi attachment just didn’t do it for me. I found it awkward and chunky and a little bit boring, even the bulbs weren’t something I’d rave about and no it didn’t do it for my g-spot either. But then again I am hard to please and I have decided my anatomy is weird so you probably would love it, it does have a good vibration going and all that jazz but I don’t know, something was missing. So out of ten? I’d probably give it a 6 or a 7.

Dr Vibe however is a completely different story …
I’ve nicknamed it the ‘alien spawn’ … seriously look at the thing!

So you have a three in one deal with this wee spawn. A clitoral tickler, a weird shaped vaginal insert that is supposedly designed to tickle your g-spot and it does that quite damn well and an anal piece which is beaded and about the same size as an extra long finger. I was dubious as it’s not overly huge and well I like huge. It feels like jelly but a bit firmer and it’s very flexible which is great for trying to angle everything in the right position. It does take a bit of angling to get everything to sit in the right place and in the end I left the anal beads outside and let them tickle me senseless instead of trying to insert them. The clit tickler … O.M.G combined with the ooompphh generated by the bloody Fairy Wind sent my eyeballs into the back of my head pretty damn fast on its highest speed. Now this attachment is ONLY compatible with the Mini Fairy Wand, it won’t fit on anything else and is designed to fit snuggly tight. The clit tickler has loads of tiny little nodules that all vibrate when the wand is on. The vaginal/g-spot bit is smooth and flared and fits snuggly in your vagina and curls to find the g-spot, the anal section is beaded and smooth. So you have a few different textures that all transfer a the vibration from the wand extra well, infact so well you forget there is an attachment on the damn thing. It truly is beautifully evil. It’s overall length is 5″ and has an insertable length of 2 1/4″ but really? Size doesn’t matter with this one, it’s the powerhouse vibrations and the placement of all the parts combined that sends you skyrocketing into orgasmic bliss. You don’t have to thrust it, a gentle rock or no movement at all does the trick quite nicely. I’m in love.

I’d happily give it a 9 out of ten … the only flaw … make it bigger because it was a bitch manouvering the clit tickler to sit in the right place.

I liked the Mini Wand Attachment the best.

BUT now my Mini Wand is stuck on the high setting I’m dubious to jump in there with no bloody warm up and no way of dialing it down(read here if you missed that part) . Thank gawd it was okay when I did try it out. Actually I tried it out a few times because I couldn’t get enough of it. It’s pure orgasmic evil.

The fun you could have with these two toys and a bound submissive could be highly entertaining, especially with the evil spawn one. The jollies one ima thinking it could be tweaked or yano electrified or something to make it a little more scary and mind blowing. But thats me. Heh. Think about it …. it could have merit. I’m freekin hiding mine.

So a big thanks to Carrie Ann at Eden Fantasys for sating my curiosity yet again, and it surprised me, I really did think I’d be shouting from the rooftops about the Hitachi one but nooo.

There’s a few Kiwi bands I like but one I have followed for a number of years and seen live many, many times is Shihad. They used to play at the local bar in my hometown and we would rock along and go have a few drinks, headbang and sing our hearts out. The same mates, arm in arm, enjoying the music and the solidarity of friendship. Jon Toogood, the lead singer, had this beautiful long black hair back then he would swish about hehe. The band was one of the only more known metal/grunge type band playing in NZ at the time and had a small following of kiwi fans. They are now in their 22nd/23rd year together now which is freakin awesome and still rockin out sweet tunes.

Shihad opened their Love Is the New Hate album tour with a free concert in Auckland’s Aotea Square, and an extensive tour of Australia and New Zealand, including a spot on the main stage at Splendour In The Grass in front of an audience of approximately 20,000. The band has also toured with Cog, the Datsuns, and opened for Evanescence on part of their 2006/2007 world tour. They also played at the Big Day Out here in Auckland in 2008 and supported ACDC in their downunder tour here earlier last year as well as a multitude of concerts throughout NZ and Australia over the last few years.

(spring chickens … this is showing my age)

There was a wee bit of a drama with the bands name ‘Shihad’ after the September 11 terroist attacks and they changed their name to Pacifier. Lots of people at home thought this idea was shit as the band had never been looked at as anything to do with a holy war overseas, it was a metal band, a band we all grew up with and loved.  The bands name was actually inspired after members of the band saw David Lynch’s 1984 film, Dune, based on Frank Herbert’s classic science fiction novel of the same name.

Quote from an interview in Opus Issue 7 – 2003 (Newcastle University student magazine) Interview: Pacifier – By John Grayson.

“

John Grayson: How did the name Shihad come about anyway?Tom Larkin: Well, see that’s the biggest cock-up out. When we were 15 we were all into this sci-fi movie Dune. See, Dune uses all these Arabic words throughout the movie and the end battle is a Jihad. We were stupid and thought it’d be a great name for a band so we called ourselves Shihad cause we couldn’t even spell it.

”

Following the September 11 terrorist attacks, the band decided to change their name due to the similarity between the band’s name Shihad and the Arabic word jihad. At the 2002 Big Day Out music festival in Auckland, New Zealand they released t-shirts with ‘Shihad’ on them, and ‘Remote’ printed below, indicating that ‘Remote’ was to be the new name. However, due to this name being taken already, they settled on “Pacifier”, which was a successful single from their album The General Electric. They released an album, Pacifier, under this name in 2002.

On 17 September 2004, the band announced to the world that they would change their name back to Shihad. To quote the band, “The events surrounding the name change and our choice to be known as Pacifier are well documented. As much as we believed in what we were doing, and the reasons for doing it at the time – the truth is we were wrong.”

I’m kinda glad they did change it back because I always referred to them as Shihad and not Pacifier, it just didn’t fit with the band or their music. And I still enjoy turning up the noise to LOUD and having a good old headbang. I just might have to go put my neck back in afterwards …

(this is them now)

Anyhoo, this is one of their latest songs … enjoy xx

• Antalixic (ant-uh-licks-ik) adj. Someone who always passes over the licorice jellybeans.
• Arachnoleptic fit n. The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.
• Beelzebug n. Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
• Blamestorm (blaym-storm) v. To sit around in a group discussing who is responsible for the latest failure.
• Elbonics (el-bon-iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.
• Ignoranus n. A person who’s both stupid and an a–hole.
• Inoculatte: n. To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
• Karmageddon n. It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.
• Quadriboobage—The appearance of having four bosoms caused by wearing a bra that is too small.
• Mouse Potato (maus-puh-tay-duh) n. The on-line, wired generation’s answer to the couch potato.
• Percussive Maintenance (pur-kuh-shun mayt-nuns) n. Repairing an electronic appliance by giving it a good whack
• IMglish—Wthe abbreviated language of instant messaging. IMing has already entered the language alongside IDing as an acronymic verb.
• Keypal—So what do you call a pen pal if you never use a pen to write him (or her)? Well, if you use a keyboard, this one will work.
• Phobar —adjective, Acronym for “Photoshopped Beyond All Recognition.”
• Adverblasting —When a commercials audio is much louder than the program that you actually want to watch
• Podestrian— A person who can be spotted with the iconic white standard iPod earbuds in their ears.

So I was having a conversation with Rogue today about personal massagers and we were having a giggle over an article online about some chick who died using a ‘massager’ …  it’s not really funny at all, rather bizarre actually …

Only Woman to Ever Use a Neck Massager on a Neck Dies

Barely anyone would actually think to use an electric neck massager to massage his or her neck. And now there’s a damn good reason for that: It could kill you!

Or at least you could die if you’re absent-minded and forget to take off your necklace before getting your rubdown like a woman in Florida:

Paramedics found the neck massager on the floor next to the woman. Investigators believe the massager got tangled on her necklace and tightened it around her neck, causing her to lose consciousness and stop breathing.

While the woman’s death is believed to be an unfortunate—and almost ridiculous—accident, “homicide investigators are withholding details about the massaging device until the investigation is complete.” [MSNBC]

Which got us onto the topic of Hitachis and all things that Hitachi’s are renowned for and deviant things you can do with a Hitachi and those cool belt things that hold them in place. Then I mentioned the Fairy Wand and how bloody powerful it was.

He hadn’t seen one in action so I tootled off to grab mine and show him. I plugged it in and gave it to him. He turns it on and taaadaaahhh …

…the powers that be are sadistic.

My Fairy Wand is brokered

It’s STUCK on high. When things break they normally die in the ‘sex toy world’

But nooooooo. Not this little evil bastard.

It won’t go any other speed except eye rolling, screaming orgasm speed.

This is evil.

Truly evil.

I haz a sad. While I was busy ‘oh noeing’ he was smirking.

He thought it was funny.

All I can say is thank fuck I have finished reviewing the toy I am about to blog about because I don’t think I could handle it on permanent high.

‘blinks’