Let’s see I’ve done feck all except get my ass kicked in memory and monopoly by a six year old. My stubborn streak made me want to keep playing monopoly for a ridiculous amount of time until he caved and said he was hungry … he still kicked my ass. Tinbum. Meh.

My back has been a bitch for the last couple of days so I’ve not gone near the computer alot, instead I had an OCD urge and went through all of my paperwork and bedroom jumble and cleaned out a whole pile of stuff and re-organised a whole pile of stuff. Heh.

So on that note …  it’s a meme today …

if you wanna play feel free …

1. Four jobs you’ve had in your life

Dressage Groom

Art Teacher

Screenprinter

Avon Lady (haha yes …   shut . up. )

2. Four jobs you wish you had

Veterinarian

Horse Breeder & Trainer

Bed & Breakfast Owner

Author

3. Four movies you can watch over and over again

The Notebook

Blow

Queen of the Damned

The Bucket List

4. Four TV shows you love to watch

Fringe

Lost

Sons of Anarchy

The Vampire Diaries

5. Four websites you visit daily

Smashing Magazine

Fetlife

99designs

Crowdspring (yeah mostly geeky ones)

6. Four of your favorite foods

Meat

Sushi

Milky Bar

Red Bull (it’s a food group )

7. Four things you won’t eat

Pumpkin

Avocado

Over cooked vegetables YUCK

Processed Cheese Slices

8. Four things in your bedroom

A huge pile of web design and photoshop magazines

Loads of books

My dogs ashes

A scooby doo toy

9. Four things you wish you had in your bedroom

Four poster bed which converts into devious fun

a naked man in my bed would be nice right now

an ensuite with a spa bath

if we are talking right now … chocolate

10. Four things you’re wearing right now

umm haha sunglasses, pentagram, nailpolish, earrings

11. One place you’d rather be right now

in a cabin in the middle of nowhere with a view of the sea

12. One fictional place you’d rather be right now

On a tropical island somewhere, there’s loads of them in movies hehe

13. Four people you’d really love to have dinner with

Sean Connery (he’d totally sate my accent fetish)

Sydney Poitier

Johnny Depp

Peter Jackson

14. Four things you’re thinking about right now

I want a coffee

I want chocolate

I want to watch a good movie but I dunno what movie to pick

Fuck need to get work done but I think I shall go read and give my back a break

15. Four of your favorite things/people

knee high socks

corsets

doing anything arty

music … MUST.HAVE.MUSIC

Seriously.

A bluey greeny tentacle all glowy and shit. I had lots of fun playing light saber tentacle star wars re-enactments too ‘beams’

Now before I begin … go read this … then come back and keep reading. Seriously there’s a reason why. Read it? Finished it?

Okay now … that was really hawt wasn’t it? (If you didn’t go read it … go do it or you won’t get the rest of this post) … I’m waiting….

Now you have a little insight as to the fantasy of tentacle sex there is a curiosity perhaps as to how one could possibly sate this fantasy with the use of a sex toy that looks and feels like a tentacle.

Remittance Girl explained it well in a recent post looking for writers who would like to submit erotica in this taboo genre …

“What interests me, sociologically, about tentacle erotica is that it is still serving that same purpose of allowing us to metaphorically indulge in aspects of sexuality which society still considers taboo.  First and foremost among these, for me at least, is the involuntary congress with the strange. But the spectre of being pleasured against one’s will, the possibility of multiple synchronous penetrations, the fetishizaton of fluids, the organic bondage aspect and, for some, the impregnation possibilities are all  things which fire the imagination.”

What gets me after doing some research and reading up a little on this fascinating erotic fantasy is it can be seen to deal with the non consensual aspects. Being held down, stripped naked and every orifice penetrated by tentacles probing, fucking and being covered in some slime like substance and alien type cum. It’s sick, it’s dark and it’s taboo.

In Japan it’s a huge aspect of hentai and anime porn.

Imagine being caught by one freakishly ugly and very perverted monster that loves fucking chicks using his miriad of tentacles. Your hands and legs are held down by strong tentacles that wrap around your limbs and pin you down, tearing off all of your clothes, spreading your long legs wide open and then pushing  his huge tentacle deep inside your pussy. You cry out and suddenly your voice is muffled with another tentacle pushing itself inside your hungry mouth. Another tentacle is playing about the opening of your ass. Other tentacles are groping, squeezing and sucking on your nipples …

You get the idea huh?

Still not sure? Perhaps you need more convincing?

Why not have a play…

Now if that has you curious enough you can sit down and watch Impy waffling about how she got this freakish toy to try out and her experience (plus my weird kiwi accent hehe)

Feel free to read my review too. If you have tentacle fantasies then this toy could be the one to sate them. And hell even if you don’t want tentacle sexors it’s an awesome desk ornament for seafaring lovers and octopus enthusiasts!

I now want robot sex. *nods*

$85.99Tentacle Dildo by Whipspider rubberworks Material: Silicone Safety: Buy from EdenFantasys

 

A big thanks to Carrie Ann & Eden Fantasys for allowing me to have some freakish fun!

(pssstt by the way, all the red text? … they are surprise links to all sorts of things lol .. some are NSFW)

There’s a wonderful saying Biddable coined and I love it …

YKINMKAIPDGAFWYKI
(Your Kink Is Not My Kink And I Personally Don’t Give A Fuck What Your Kink Is)

It’s not meant to insult. It’s not meant as anything much but simple acceptance that everyone that does the BDSM thing does it their own way. As long as it doesn’t impede on me personally I don’t give a fuck what you do. I don’t. As much as there are some things out there that completely freak me out and cause me to go eeewww fuck no that’s wrong! It’s because it’s out of my comfort zone or it’s something I just cannot fathom being comfortable doing. It’s not right for me.

So if you can live by the YKINMKAIPDGAFWYKI philosophy
Feel free to click …

rough body play.
I likes it.
It gets rid of rage and angries.
The hurt feels good.
The after effects only visual.
Inside calm.
Iceberg shots … I haz dem.
Those are the nice ones.

Yurpeen Hoose of  Edumacashuns of Slavishness

Special High Intensity Training

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from slaves, it will be our policy to keep all slaves well taught through our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give our slaves more S.H.I.T. than any other establishment. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the training course, please see your nearest sadist. You will be immediately placed at the top of the S.H.I.T. list, and our sadists are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the S.H.I.T. you require.

Slaves who don’t know S.H.I.T. will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EDUCATIONAL EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.).

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T. seriously will have to go to EDUCATIONAL ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T. S.H.I.T.).

If you are full of S.H.I.T., you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L. S.H.I.T.).

For slaves who are intending to pursue a career in doormat policies and consultancy, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.). This course emphasizes on how to manage M.O.R.E. S.H.I.T.

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TRAINING, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T. S.H.I.T.).
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TEACHING
B.I.G. S.H.I.T.

Sir Sadist That Will Make Your Life A Living Hell
S.S.T.W.M.Y.L.A.L.H)

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When you have an itch and it needs sating, when the masochist is coming to the fore and shes wild and unkempt and needing solace … she hunts.

Sometimes in the wrong places.

A question got me yesterday afternoon. It was simple enough and I already knew the answer as did they. I got annoyed at myself.

“Do you want to be the leader or the follower?”

The wolf. She’s a leader, a fierce, fiesty bitch of one. But there’s a different side to her. One that only comes out of it’s dark crevices when she knows it’s safe to. When she can trust. When she knows.

I sure as hell don’t want to be the leader. I don’t want to settle down for any random thing just to get two minute kicks. I sure as hell know that I am not the right person to guide someone into the world of BDSM/kink/ D/s or M/s. Ugh. Vanilla is not my thing. Nada zilch. It just doesn’t do it for me. It’s like a moth eaten blanket that doesn’t keep me warm. Boredom would set in rather quickly.

As much as I crave something intense and intimate, a vunerable space, a place to be able to let down my walls and just be, I’m not in a hurry. Hell if it was all about sex I could pop down to the local pub and pick up something lol. It’s not.

I get what I need in doses, enough to give my inner masochist a little solace. It keeps me sane. It’s enough for now.

I’m single by choice because I don’t want second best. I need a leader not a follower.

I’m learning to have a little courage and start being true to myself. Start listening to that inner voice and trusting in my decisions.

When you have someone who can remind you on occassion what you already know, well it’s refreshing. It reminds me to stop being an asshat and listen to my instincts.

I remind myself I do know what I want and need.

I have some bloody wonderful people in my life. Those special people near and far mean the world to me. Their words are comfort.

So the masochist is sat smiling. She’s okay. She’ll hunt when the time is right.

Right now, she’s sated enough.

She’s sooooo not a leader.