Search terms … I haz dem and jebeesus sometimes they just plain make me giggle ….

two nice handfuls ~ of what? Coconuts?

how to negotiate puppy fetish play ~ Let’s see thats easy. I don’t woof. Wolfies don’t play nice. They are not puppies *wink*

sockgasms ~ omg a person after my own heart. Sockgasms I haz dem. That reminds me it’s about time for another sock buying expedition …

make butt plug dissapear ~ you did or you want to? Confuddled and a bit worried ….

tied behind her clit ~ yano as much as I try I just can’t visualise this. How the hell does one tie something behind a clit? Plz explain …

why do i keep making the wrong choice ~ errr go ask Aunt Annie she’s over there *points* … sheesh

installed human toilet slave ~ okay this one I am concerned with … installing a human being for a toilet? How does one actually do that?

bacon nips ~ someone took a wrong turn somewhere … hungry? How the hell did they end up here? *blinks*

sex my ass ~ sex your own ass buddy

u got lovely breasticles ~ geee thanks! … and yes and in winter I have icy nips too *beam*

getattachment sex ~ the geek in me is thinking … file attachment? You can get a sex one nowdays? Sheesh the interwebz is freekin amazing it has everything!

ip tracker for fetlife ~ should one be concerned with this search term?

chicks using a hitachi ~ dude musta been having a wanking session. Yes that’s it.

impy pics ~ another wanking session? Stalker? Obsessed much?

fuck my ass shebitch ~ how about I fuck it with a plank of wood and make you lick it clean afterwards? Splinters are the new thing these days *grin*

average minutes it takes a man to climax ~ uuuuum I have no idea I have never really thought about it cause yano at the time I am normally enjoying myself.

buttplug disappear ~ now thats a worry and it’s come up a couple times which makes me start to wonder why the hell they think I have the answers …

bitch gave me an itch ~ well then silly boy that would be a plethora of reasons but basically because you are stupid enough to not use protection or mebe you had the itch in the first place? Mebe you are just dumb … bitch is a term for a female dog so I am now a little concerned that you are doing things you really shouldn’t be … *blinks*

That is all.

I am bored.

My Hitachi beckons.