Years ago I bought a rabbit (no not the fluffy kind). It was bought simply because I was curious and wanted a vibrator. The very first vibrator I bought was the top of the line rabbit at the time. I had heard rave reviews and well I like clit stimulation quite alot. I also like cock as well and if I couldn’t have it when I wanted I wanted a sex toy that would do the job. And do it well. I remember the day it arrived in the post, the little one was fast asleep in his cot and the SO was away on yet another driving trip at the time so it was immediately whipped out, batteries inserted and within about 2 minutes I was in orgasmic bliss. And greedily kept playing with it until the squeaks from my baby who had woken and spoilt my fun made me stop lol. It was my best friend for a good four years until I snapped the shaft *snikker* … it was well used.

I mourned the death of my favourite toy. Along the way we had experimented with cock rings, and vibrating clit toys and creams and other various bits and bobs but that vibrator was by far my favourite toy. I like intense stimulation, the stronger the better. Most toys bore me. They just don’t have that extra oompfff I like.

Over the past few months I purchased a few more things one of them I enjoy is Viva Cream, instant horn on with a minute amount plonked on the clit. It makes me rabid quite quickly and enhances any stimulation and orgasms that follow.  Smartballs are fantastic wee things and can get one quite worked up and wet over a days use.

This morning I hopped out of the shower, got dressed and decided to go check the mail as I have been waiting on a package to turn up. What happened?

I walked outside up the stairs to the gate and there was sat a package. Instant squee. Grabbed it and ran back to my room. Ripped it opened and grinned from ear to ear. I am now the proud owner of a Hitachi Magic Wand. For the last few weeks I have been gazing at a transformer box that has been waiting to have a Hitachi attached to it, the transformer box was a pressie from Velvet hehe. Inside the package was also two attachments which were provided by the lovely man who managed to get a crapload of Hitachi’s to NZ. They are not available here and a pain in the butt to source from here so I am very grateful. I wanted the real thing not some rip off pretend Hitachi.

The vibration from the Hitachi is gooooood. My pants came off rather quick and I got down to business. First the Hitachi directly on the clit. Surprisingly I wasn’t horny today, I have been in a shit of a mood so my first play with this wasn’t with any heightened sexual urges just plain curiosity. On the clit? Oh yea, damn good, vibrations are intense and strong and instant twinges but no orgasm, it has pretty much two settings … strong and stronger. I much like the stronger hehe. The lower setting is okay reminds me of my rabbit. I then plonked the g-spot one on the end of the wand (the curved one) and off we went … oh yes I did get an orgasm from that, a nice slow building drawn out one. I am not one of those chicks that is going to orgasm straight from a Hitachi being on my clit. I can’t even actually fathom doing so lol, never have from just plain old clit stimulation and nothing else. Well not yet anyways. I am thinking a little bit of pain mingled with various things and that … oh yea.

The after effects is I have a quietly tingling clit and well aware its part of my anatomy. I think I quite like that sensation.

I have been online sussing out attachments as I am not particulary fussed on the texture of the attachments, the inside of the dildo parts is hollow and you can squeeze and bend them quite easily. I have found a better one that has a raised nub so you get more clitorial stimulation whilst using the attachment. I am thinking I may have to purchase that (you know for educational, experimental purposes). The other attachment pfffttt … didn’t do feck all for me at all. In reality I think I’d much prefer a big, juicy cock along with the Hitachi rather than plastic fantastic pretend boys. It just isn’t the same.

Basically my head is in a shitty state and my mood is not much better so I am going for a second review round when I am actually horny and not just greedily playing with toys cause I can. I have a feeling I’ll have a ripper of an orgasm or six later. I also am going to use it for my arm injury and muscles when things get a bit tense to see if it will help alleviate it when I am achy.

Downside to it and the only downside so far is the noise. Solution get a lock on my door (we’ve just moved and the bedrooms have no locks), and turn music up… loud. It won’t be something I’ll be using when the house is bustling with activity lol. I’m kinda shy & private like that lol.

So yea my rabbit may have died and the replacement rabbit which I don’t much like but have been using is now retired cause I have a much waited for Hitachi and it has the impy thumbs up for uber excellent.

I have had the most hellish mood swings in the last 48 hours. I dunno why the fuck it’s happening but it’s starting to annoy me. Short tempered, snappy pretty much a cantankerous bearch. Doesn’t make hanging around me much fun. I get daily horoscopes sent to my email and the outlook for the past couple days and tomorrow is pretty much chaos and madness galore. Oh joy. Advice … “stay calm and don’t forget to breathe”. Mars is in full swing.

Somebody knock me out for a few days until this bitchy foul mood passes please.

Anyone got a spare cage or arm to chew?

*sigh*

You know when three kinky people have a couple wines and lax out and talk random stuff the conversation can veer off into some very warped, amusing discussions. Which is exactly what happened last night with Molten, Velvet and I.

Vegetable sex. You know cucumbers, and other various penis shaped pervetables in the vegetable form and even some which are not quite penis shaped but uber interesting mind tangents to muse just how appropriate or entertaining they could be. The conversation then warped off into various vegies and then lo and behold we are sat there crying from loadsa laughter inventing a restaurant. The perfect kinky dining experience, fuck with vegetables then have them cooked to your specialty, or yano, cook em while you play, oven style via the pussy.

We begin with the cucumber, perhaps a marinade of pussy juices then sliced into a delicious salad of your choosing, perhaps you could incorporate other vegetables, salad ingredients into this like mebe a grated courgette (you know build up the sizes first). Imagine that… orgasmic after effects of eating pervertable vegies, hehe or is that side effects?

What about potatoes, eggplants (yea my eyes widened too), parsnips,carrots, squash. You know its a very good way to get a guy to eat his vegies if he has an aversion to them. Add a bit of kinky flavour and tahdah! Baked in a special oven *snigger*

Molten even said what about peas? Sure Impy says, frozen peas packed into a condom inserted into the pussy for extra special slow heat steamin!

The name for this bizarre dining experience … Frottage … hehe which I said sounded like a kind of yoghurt. You don’t wanna know where that one went, srsly. Greek yoghurt was mentioned and then Impy was singin “lalalala” and squickin … I don’t think I likes Greek yoghurt so much now.

Omg the tears and laughter from such a sick, depraved and totally warped mind bending discussion on vegetable sex was brilliant and much needed laughter. I had tears from laughing so hard.

But no Frottage will not be opening soon.

But seriously …

Do we need health warnings on phallic shaped vegetables “Eat at own risk” … “Improper use is liable to corrupt and deprave the mind”

Apparently there are Vegetarian groups in an uproar wanting vegetables to be protected from this abuse. You know cause vegies have no voice and all.

Has anyone asked the vegetables what they think?

Anyone wanna come over for dinner? *snigger*

skin tight, muscles shudder

goosebumps surface

sensations abound

pleasure & pain swirl

tenderness & heat reign

angry welts appear on assaulted skin

fingers skim and eyes admire

a smile appears

more please? …  she asks greedily

“No”, he says

hurrrmmpfff

she watches

the dark mark appears

growth & change constant

(since I didn’t have time to do an HNT this week you get a special treat today instead … clicky)

Iz baaaack.

Well kinda. Still living in amongst half unpacked things and getting the new house functional is getting there. We even managed to have an awesome family dinner the other night which was uber cool. It’s the easter break here so a long holiday weekend is being had which is good to get some much needed catch up rest time. I am looking forward to things settling down a little now. The little one is now enrolled in school *insert happy squee dance here*  … and no I am not one of theose soppy parents who is going to cry at my son going to school, quite frankly I am relieved these five long hard years of insane at home parenting are reaching a new stage. It’s time for my wee little man to grow some more. And mummeh needs time out to get stuck into a serious wee business venture I have been plotting away with of late. Six whole hours of bliss a day.

Even better I went and checked my emails last night after the tinternets were connected and after sifting through a good wad of bloody emails found one that had me bouncing in my seat … hitachi should be here Tuesday/Wednesday aaaaand for being such a patient wee imp apparently in the package are two extra perks … two free attachments hehe. Oh my I am rather impatient to play with them all. Look out for an impy review of this toy everyone keeps waffling about. I am picking I will become another uber pleased waffler of the great wonders of the Hitachi. I need a fucking good orgasm or six right now.

Molten and Velvet have both attacked my wee body in the past few days, I have been crunched and cracked and my back is feeling halfway normal again. I’m so pleased Velvet has manged to crack my back as normally not many can, its usually a wound up tight mass of muscle thats annoyingly infuriatiing. I hold my stress in my shoulders and back. I also have a beeg black bruise developing on one upper arm from a set of chompy teeth hehe and I am thoroughly enjoying poking the fuck out of it right now and the other arm has a nicely formed set of teeth bruises adorning it. I really do like being knawed on, makes one all goosebumpy.

This week is getting settled back into a routine, getting stuck into work which I have been neglecting alot of late and catching up on a nice wee collection of books I have been dying to read. Lotsa laxing out on mah wee wolfie bed, and being able to wander about in mah room with boyshorts hehe and no bloody rugrat sharing my space and annoying the crap out of me. I haz mah lair and I am grinning.

Most of all I have these two awesome uber cool people in my life I love to bits even when they both drive me bonkers I still luffs em.

Now off to catch up on some light reading … a good five days worth of bloggers posts to up to speed on

(you better have not all gone bonkers and written craploads in the past week or I’ll be stuck here all day) x

Awww and guess what, one of the kids just walked in with flowers for me, a random gift and made me all heart mushy (and omg the flowers are pink)