I feel icky, I have a flu coming on and mummy’s can’t get sick lol so it’s off to the herbalist I go. My head therefore feels like a steamtrain has hit it so as far as creative thoughts, well they have taken a vacation and been replaced with an army of little men playing drums in my head.

A Shibari night is being organised and in a couple weeks time I get to meet some wonderful people I have had the pleasure of chatting to on and off for the past couple months YAY!  Am looking forward to it and a little nervous hehe. I am generally a shy person in social situations until I get to know someone so this is a great step forward in my wee journey and I am happy it’s being organised by people I respect and adore.  Who knows we may well end up with some lovely pics of rope marks Either way shibari fascinates me as an art form and the whole idea of being bound num num. So excited hehe.

Not much to write today, off to drop the rugrat at kindy then home to have a cat nap, a new book arrived today “Screw the Roses…” so looking forward to having a wee poke inside the book.  One can never read enough and finally it’s time to explore this world of mine in a more physical sense. Building a good circle of friends I can talk, explore and develop amazing friendships with. And finally meet woop

The last Dom (the stalker as we have come to so affectionately refer to him as) really insulted me by insinuating “book reading” was nothing useful in my exploration as a submissive … I beg to differ.  If it wasn’t for those books I have read and been reffered to by trusted friends then idiots like him would have done alot more damage.  His problem was he was in a hurry to force submission from me, and a few red flags became apparent hence I stepped away. Aggressive was the term I would use and something I don’t react well to on the best of days. The guy had issues lol. He was a power tripping freak. I don’t need to be changed, brainwashed into a subservient mindless wench thanks. I want a partnership, a connection, someone who wants to explore this whole journey together and I’ll know when its right. Not because some git tells me it is lol.

And excuse me but six long months of a D/s long distance relationship was real enough for me lol. It can work quite well if the time and effort is there which it was and my god did I grow from it, intelligence and creativity can be amazing things when ones mind is ready.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with having an inquisitive mind and questioning things which is why I read and write. I totally agree that no amount of “book reading” will equate to “realness” but both are a part in my mind. I am taking it slowly, no rushing, exploring. And most importantly … learning. It’s almost become a daily thing for me to pass on a link or suggest a specific book if someone is curious about something.

And the next part of the journey is about to begin, I get to have squishy hugs real time with my online friends woo yay Right off to take cover under a duvet and try get some sleep while my house is peaceful lol.